therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
