i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
