Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
