So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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