good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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