you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Randomize
