So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
