I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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