she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
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