Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
one might say we're banned from that church
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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