soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I intend to get homeless drunk
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
