glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize