They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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