That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
