Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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