I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
