mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
