You work out of a Hotel?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize