We won't sleep together?
farters have to be the big spoon...
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
