No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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