so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
