dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize