So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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