i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize