Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
