Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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