You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
