I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize