please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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