Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
