how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
