HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
