Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Did I show you my penis last night?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize
