i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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