I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
