Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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