Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
