yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
