Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize