I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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