i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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