Fuck appropriateness.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
