I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
