so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
