are you still at the devil's house?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
