I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize