Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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