Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
kristin has been a bad kristin
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
