I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize