It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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