im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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